Today is the day that I realized I have counted down 100 days! It seems as if it went by so quick until the 10th of December, or 5 weeks before “the surgery,” as that was when all the feels hit me, and every thing has just began dragging on. December 14th even more feels hit me, with it being one month until then. December 17th more feels hit me, as it was 4 weeks. December 24th even more feels hit me because it, 3 weeks. December 26th more feels, as I could never be kicked in the dangly bits again. I am expecting more feels on the 31st, as it will 2 weeks away. More on January 1st 2019, as I will realize it is happening that calendar year. More feels on the 7th, 1 week away. More feels on the 11th as that is the last time I will get my hair done while still attached to dangly bits. I know I will have even more feels on the 12th it being the day I fly away, more on the 13th as it will be one day before the surgery although I have medication to help me sleep and as I understand it there will be more provided I really do not plan on sleeping. On the 14th even more feels will hit me before the surgery and then when I wake up after the surgery. I really hope the feels will start to go away after that but I do know there will be more feels when they remove the the dressing, gauze, and dilator.
I wish these feels got a little easier in between each time but they are just compounding.